… you thought!

We’re not even two weeks into the new year and I already have a new blog post for y’all in the Shygirl & Relationships series. I’ve realized that my writing is the most authentic when I write about things in real time or when I am reflecting on them so here we are…

A little over two years ago one of my good friends from college wanted to set me up with this guy. I knew nothing about him only that my friend thought that we would be good together. Little did my friend know this person was in a full blown relationship (talk about awkward), so I just was like “sigh” that could’ve been something. I am definitely not going to break up any type of relationship so I just put that to the side, was still friends with this person on social media and in my mind I thought “well someday this could be something.” I was only reminded of him when his posts would pop up on my timeline, but it was just that.

Fast-forward to a few months ago. I found out that this person was no longer in that relationship, I couldn’t just shoot my shot so I had to be strategic about it, or however you go about doing that. I wouldn’t say that I slid into his DMs but I responded to something he posted and after a little small talk, he gave me his number. I was so excited but wanted to play it cool so naturally I fell asleep before I could text him. The next day I woke up and looked back at the message to make sure it wasn’t just in my dream because trust me, I have some very realistic dreams. Anyway this is all just backstory. So eventually we start texting and he’s asking these insightful questions and I am just like “wow” I’ve never really met a guy who wants to get this deep as soon as we started texting. This immediately made him more attractive as he actually seemed to take an interest in me.

Little did I know this interest would quickly fade away. I know they say that guys have short attention spans but didn’t know it was that short. Eventually I noticed that he wasn’t texting me back or really trying to communicate with me at all. I still continued to show interest because like I said in one of my previous posts, I always put forth a lot of effort. I guess he realized that I wasn’t getting the point but he eventually he told me that he had found someone else. I’m all about honesty, but telling a girl that clearly likes you, that you like someone else is not the way to go. This opens up all of these different questions… “was I just a placeholder?”, “what does she have that I don’t?”, “she’s obviously better than me, so was he ever actually interested?”, etc. So now I’m stuck with all of these unanswered questions that will probably remain unanswered. Guys are so quick to bring up that they still want to maintain friends, but is that because you actually want to be my friend or do you want to keep me in your back pocket in case that other girl doesn’t work out? You know, guys are really weird like that.

So now I’m faced with the fact that once again I started liking someone and they did not like me back. This is the unfortunate reality that I’ve been living for the past several years and I’m starting to think that it will be this way for awhile. I am sure there will be more Shygirl & Relationships posts as this year continues and I’m hoping that one of them will end on a positive note!